Tag Archives: Poetry

Suicide – An Old Problem in A Brave New World

Suicide is not a modern problem. Talking about it openly may be the result of the relaxed attitudes of contemporary culture, but people have been taking their own lives for centuries. In fact, the prophet Elijah expresses suicidal thoughts in the Bible. Yet, he is regarded as one of the most remarkable men who walked the earth. From raising a widow’s son from the dead to fighting against a tyrannical monarchy, Elijah’s accomplishments would put most of the comparatively small scale achievements of everyday mortals to shame.

But Elijah was all too human, just like all of us are. And, being so, he succumbed to the hopelessness and despair that envelops the weary spirit in the appropriately named dark nights of the soul.

In I Kings 19:4, it is written, of Elijah, “He sat down under the solitary broom tree and prayed that he might die. ‘I have had enough,’ he said, ‘Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors who have already died.'”

God’s promise to be an “ever present help in times of trouble” is exemplified in Elijah’s story for while Elijah slept, God sent an angel to him to strengthen him with food and water.

However, there are times when the promises of God seem more like empty words than something solid that one can rely upon. For those who believe there is no God, there are no promises to fall back on- and, in a way, maybe that’s easier to bear than imagining one has been abandoned by one’s Creator.

Regardless of spiritual or religious beliefs, though, suicide is at its core a problem encompassing all of humanity. Much of the time, even now, it’s pushed aside or reframed in such a way that its seriousness is diluted. From “a coward’s way out” to “a permanent solution to a temporary problem,” trite and often hurtful sayings abound, none of which serve any real purpose other than adding guilt or shame to the already broken spirit of the person contemplating ending his or her life.

I know the feeling of hopelessness that leads to thinking of taking one’s life all too well because I have experienced it first-hand. Many others have who are either too proud or too ashamed to admit it, but I see no reason in writing at all unless one comes from a place of truth.

Those who, like me and millions of others, have thought of taking our own lives are in stellar company. The prophet Elijah is only the beginning of a long list of people, many of whom were famous, successful, and wealthy who took their own lives.

Iconic American author Ernest Hemingway took his own life with a single gunshot to the head, ending the earthly existence of a man who had won both the Pulitzer and Nobel prizes and whom many critics called “the greatest writer of the 20th Century.”

Although the choice he made puzzled and dismayed many, it was his way of creating his own ending to the book of his life. The majority of those who read his fiction know little of the struggles fought by Hemingway behind the scenes, but chapters filled with illness and great physical and emotional anguish and suffering finally took their toll on him.

Poets Anne Sexton and Sylvia Plath, both rare geniuses with distinctive voices that travel through the decades of time, made the choice to take their own lives. Although we can shrug off such incidents by ascribing them to mental illness or just being “nuts,” doing so only demonstrates our intellectual laziness and lack of empathy. Ridiculing, scoffing at, minimizing and dismissing serious subjects only makes one look shallow and callous. It doesn’t add to one’s stature in the eyes of others, however much it might do so in one’s own mind.

All earthly life is precious, and this includes all human life. Thus, when it is lost, it should be regarded as a tragedy, particularly if it could have been prevented.

And much of the time, it can be. We mortals minimize the damage we do to one another by failing to show understanding where it is needed. Those little acts of kindness, both random and not-so-random, that we all too often claim we don’t have time for, are often the very acts that could and would prevent a suicide.

Anne Sexton, another winner of the Pulitzer prize, suffered from depression and bipolar disorder. In the note she left behind, she wrote, in her signature scathing tone, “I could admit that I am only a coward crying me me me and not mention the little gnats, the moths, forced by circumstance, to **** on the electric bulb.” Sexton’s genius is undeniable from the writing she left behind, but with a single act, her brilliant literary voice was forever silenced.

Virginia Woolf, rare visionary and pioneer of the stream of consciousness, silenced her voice, as well. Yet her single act cannot negate her status as one of the most important of 20th Century modernist authors.

It’s ironic that so many whose work we regard with great acclaim and even reverence committed a final act that so many tend to regard with scorn, disdain, or a little of both.

We look towards Vincent Van Gogh’s paintings with awe, immersing ourselves in captivating starry nights and ebullient sunflowers, rarely remembering that the ingenious artist who gave us these masterpieces shot himself in the chest in a field and died two days later.

Our failure to properly address a problem that has robbed our world of so much beauty, creativity, and genius is egregious at best and inexcusable at worst.

We worship the creations of genius but fail to respect or care about the creators themselves. Is it any wonder then that the “average” man or woman who is suicidal receives so little empathy?

At this point, after centuries of being mocked, pushed under the carpet or excused via untenable justifications, suicide has reached what I would call a point of crisis. I became aware of this fully when I read an article about a 28-year-old woman who is ending her life by euthanasia this Spring. The woman, who lives in the Netherlands, is not scoffed at but rather aided in her choice by a government that has made it legal for someone to take decisive steps to end their lives, including being given the proper assistance to complete it.

While I am not trying to make this political, I do think that it shows something deeply wrong in a world if we can encourage suicide to the point of assisting in its completion yet can’t find effective ways to successfully dissuade someone from wanting to commit it in the first place.

Author William Styron, a man well acquainted with the kind of all-encompassing depression that leads to suicide once wrote, “The pain of depression is quite unimaginable to those who have not suffered it, and it kills in many instances because its anguish can no longer be borne.” He went on to say, “The prevention of many suicides will continue to be hindered until there is a general awareness of the nature of this pain.”

Styron, who ultimately succumbed to pneumonia and not suicide, is probably best known for his absorbing novels, yet it is his 84 page memoir, Darkness Visible, that elevates him from brilliant novelist to a translator of mental illness and mental health advocate for both his own time and future times. The clarity and openness with which Styron approached his own struggles with mental illness was something that writers before him who had hinted at such matters, including F. Scott Fitzgerald, had not done. Styron was willing to open himself up with the hope that, in doing so, he would help someone else who was suffering. He cared less about what the general public thought and more about who his words would reach.

Sadly, in spite of awe inspiring progressions in technology and multiple societal advances, we haven’t ever been able or willing to look at suicide as a problem that is less individual and more collective. We haven’t yet understood the link between one person’s pain and the pain of everyone around that person and how not adequately dealing with pain- not merely on an individual level but collectively- causes suicides and other tragedies.

And, yes, it helps to believe in a God that you can cry out to, but in leaving things strictly up to God or any Higher Power, we manage to absolve ourselves of our individual responsibility to take a problem like suicide seriously. By seeing it as “not our problem,” we are managing to make it more of a problem for ourselves and every mortal who walks this earth than it ever has been before. For now, in some countries and places, you can make an appointment to end your life as one might for a routine physical, and with the ostensible “normalization” of an act that is far from normal, I believe we have removed ourselves more from kinship with the human condition than ever before.

Suicide may have been as much of a problem in the old world but it’s only in a desensitized society where heartlessness has been crowned Queen and Apathy is her lady-in-waiting that one could make an appointment with a doctor to help one complete it.

Peace and blessings,

Sascha

This page and all written material at A Pilgrim’s Odyssey is written by Sascha Norris . (C) Copyright 2023-204 by Sascha Norris. All Rights Reserved.

(Photography is by Swedish Fine Art Photographer Gabriel Isak )

Life’s Defining Moments: What Do They Define?

What are life’s defining moments, and are they chosen for us or by us? This is a question I have often asked in recent times, and those of you who may have had similar inquiries will most likely be unsurprised at hearing that the answers seem elusive.

Are life’s defining moments inherently spiritual or does it depend on the moment itself and our own belief system? For me, the preeminent question within the question itself would be, what do the moments define? If they remind us of our own mortality and compel us to see life less as the random series of events it may often seem to be and more of a series of circumstances along a path of purpose, then they define not only moments but life itself.

I have often said that it’s the moments in life that, in the end, we will remember most vividly, but I overlooked an important caveat when I made such a declaration. Mere moments, random moments, moments like any other will rarely be remembered. Rather, it will be the moments that changed everything in our lives in a split second, for better or for worse, that will leave behind their indelible stamp.

All too often, particularly in a culture where the handwritten word has been replaced by email and the heartfelt conversation with a text message, we fail to grasp the seriousness of life in all its brevity. We seem oblivious to the fact that at some point, tomorrow will be the last tomorrow and that all that we love that is living will either die before us or live after us.

Poet Mary Oliver, whose work seems to be infused with an uncanny comprehension of both life’s sacredness and its impermanence once said, “To live in this world, you must be able to do three things; to love what is mortal, to hold it against your bones knowing your own life depends on it, and when the time comes to let it go, let it go.”

For me, Mary’s poetic wisdom reaches far beyond the words themselves. Her poem can be adopted as a guidebook for how one should live day by day, recognizing that everything that breathes is mortal and that all that is alive, including those plants, trees, and flowers that we don’t usually think of as sentient “beings,” will at some point die.

We are so busy trying to impress other people, building lives of success rather than significance, making money to purchase things that, much of the time, we don’t even need that the sacred portion of life remains behind a glass cabinet, like an antique vase we never touch. If only we were to slow down, open the cabinet and take out the vase, rather than allowing it to remain unused, accumulating dust.

It’s ironic how quick we often are to impose definitions on things, people, and experiences- yet, miraculously, we let life’s defining moments sweep past us without taking time to interpret them. It is only later, in retrospect, that we often become cognizant of the fact that something monumental happened to us, and because of the lapse between the past and present, deciphering the full import of those moments can be like translating a language we have never learned.

It has been said that in a world where anything seems to go, nothing remains sacred. Of course, for those who, like me, hold fast to an ongoing relationship with God, there will always be the sacredness of spirituality. But for those who have no faith and believe in nothing outside themselve, finding the sacred in today’s world might well be like trying to find a single diamond in a heap of cubic zirconia stones while blindfolded.

Yet, I wish to present the idea that the sacred still exists for everyone, and while I think God makes finding the sacred easier, it can also be found in the absorption, acknowledgement, and appreciation, of life’s defining moments.

We will never master the art of defining life itself, for it was never intended to be defined. And defining people isn’t our job but rather the assignment of a Higher Power. As for defining circumstances and situations, there are generally too many variables and perspectives involved to achieve an accurate conjecture.

But what we can define are moments- or, perhaps, they define us.

Peace & Blessings,

Sascha 🦉

This page and all written material at A Pilgrim’s Odyssey is written by Sascha Norris. (C) Copyright 2023-2024 by Sascha Norris. All Rights Reserved.

Image: Actress Emma Watson as “Rebel Belle,” a cover story for Vanity Fair, lensed by photographer Tim Walker; Stylist: Jessica Diehl; March 2017